Overcoming one of my biggest fears…
I was inspired to share my Facebook posts on overcoming my biggest fear. May it inspire you to face your fears head on with divine courage and love.
Post on August 2nd
In this moment I am taking some deep breaths and asking for strength and peace to fill my mind. My husband just bought a motorcycle and is leaving to go for a ride. He used to have a bike and rode all the time…before I met him.
After witnessing an accident and being first on the scene for the motor cyclist who crashed and died, I developed this fear around motor bikes. My husband is passionate about riding but he knew of my fear so he hasn’t considered getting a bike…until now.
He started to express his interest in riding again recently and I have had to process my fear so that I can wholeheartedly support him. He is my rock, my biggest fan and he supports me unconditionally. I knew I had to find a way to support him and his desire to ride again.
I almost had a panic attack just trying on his helmet. I just heard him ride off. I have tears welling up in my eyes as I type this and I am breathing through the anxiety and fear. One breath at a time. Creating space for fear to rise up and out allows the energy to move instead of remaining stuck.
He is a good defensive rider but my mind goes to worrying about other vehicles on the road. The only way to process my remaining fear is to surrender and accept. To allow the energy rise up and out. To give myself space to feel all my fear fully and completely so that I can move through it and beyond it.
One day perhaps I will feel enough courage to go for a ride with him….or perhaps not. For now…I am breathing in…I am breathing out…feeling the fear and making a conscious choice to let go and trust. Fear is not the boss of me.
Posted on September 29th
In August I posted about one of my biggest fears and the overwhelming anxiety I felt as I heard my husband drive off to work on his new motorcycle. He used to ride before I met him. It is something that feeds his soul. He knew of my fear around motorcycles ever since I witnessed an accident and I stood helplessly beside the rider who was thrown from his bike.
He talked about getting a bike again and asked if I would be comfortable with him riding again. I knew it was important to him so I said YES and set an intention to heal the fear so I could peacefully support his passion to ride. It has been a process of deep surrender.
At first I asked him to text me when he arrived at work and before he left to come home. That was a choice for peace for me. One day he took longer than expected (he stopped at the barn instead of coming right home) and I had a full on panic attack, dropped to my knees and cried intensely. The energy of fear was intense but I gave it space to wash up and out. I gave myself permission to feel it deeply and fully.
Every morning I would hear his bike start up I would breathe through the anxiety and panic knowing it is old energy that needed to be felt and released. I also did a soul retrieval session on my past traumas.
After a few weeks I felt neutral when he would ride off in the morning. I started to work on my fear of being on the bike as a passenger. Just trying on helmets caused the start of a panic attack. Slowly with intention I would feel the fear and imagine it rising up and out of my body. I would choose loving thoughts, encouraging thoughts, compassionate thoughts and the fear continued to shift, lessen and my body would calm down.
I have now been a passenger twice with my husband on his bike and I only had a few moments of fear on the 2nd ride when we cornered. No more panic attacks, no more take my breath away overwhelm and fear. I have overcome one of my biggest fears and that is a miracle worth celebrating!