Please watch this music video with A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera before you read my blog post:
I don’t know about you but I can’t listen to this song or watch this video without crying and feeling it deep in my heart and soul. I can relate to breaking up with someone you still love as I am sure most of us can. I can relate to feeling helpless and scared as a child wanting to hide under my sheets. I can relate to the feelings of losing a loved one because I watched my Grandmother say goodbye to my Grandfather after 67 years of marriage. It broke her heart so much that she had a heart attack the next day.Thankfully she has made a full recovery (I share more of this story in my upcoming book Heart Led Living ~ When Hard Work Becomes Heart Work)
I think the thing that hits me the deepest in this moment is the awareness and memories of all the times that I gave up on myself. How about you? Have you ever given up on YOU?
Growing up I became so disconnected from my sense of self. My heart was whispering words of love and compassion but I was so lost in the darkness of my mind that I couldn’t hear anything but the stabbing words of self judgment.
I gave up on myself many times but something in my heart keep me going. There were many mornings I woke up and was amazed I was still alive. Yet something deep inside made me get up once again. I remember lying on my bed with tears streaming down my face feeling numb and completely disconnected from life. I felt like I was dying inside. The gap between my heart and mind was so huge and it was painful.
All that changed in 2001 after a miscarriage followed by my father’s death. It was the wake up call I needed to catapult me into the realization that my life was worth living. As my self destructive behaviour shifted, I started to hear the still small voice within encouraging me to heal. I started to listen deeply to my heart and trust my intuition once again.
Today I lead with my heart in every moment. When tears come up to the surface while listening to a song like this one, I am willing to look directly at the upset and allow the expression of those long held emotions. It is simply my body speaking to me. It is my soul shining light on what still needs to heal. My heart is constantly sending a message to wake up even more because I have so much more heart work to do. My life matters and so does yours!
You need to make sure YOU don’t give up on YOU!
Here is the Truth. No matter what happened in your past you can forgive and heal. No matter how bad life seems right now, you can always turn it around. Your heart will never give up on you. Spirit, God, Source, the Universe (whatever name you have for the divine) will NEVER give up on you. It is constant. It is infinitely patient. It is loving. There is so much love for you, in fact, it is unwavering. The question is are you willing to open your heart to receive it?
If you need support on your healing path the Heart Led Living community is a inspiring group of individuals who are devoted to deep healing and leading with their heart. To learn more click here
As a side note: I chose to have a picture of my 2 pound chihuahua Penny for this blog post because the moment I started to cry while watching the video she jumped up on my lap and started licking my tears. As she tried to comfort me my heart melted even more.