In the last 2 months I have witnessed a lot of old emotions coming up to the surface for healing. Not only is the Universe calling forth everything that is no longer serving us, many of us are consciously choosing to heal any and all old wounds. That means a lot of emotions are moving up and out. The best thing you can do is create space for the expression of this long held energy. After all, emotions are energy in motion.
After embarking on the 21 Day Healing Meditation series in October I had a lot of anger rising up within me. It felt like an active volcano bubbling up and preparing for an eruption. I started to yell at my son for everything. Even though I would set an intention to see him through the eyes of love and compassion I would explode with anger at the tiniest thing he did. So not only did I have rage and anger rising up inside but I was adding guilt about yelling at my son.
After 5 days of anger I decided to sit down and talk with him. I felt the need to explain where my behaviour was coming from and ensure him that he wasn’t doing anything wrong. I explained to him that I was leading this 21 day healing meditation series and that all my old unexpressed emotions were coming up to the surface for healing along with many of the participants.
I explained “I know the last few days have been challenging because I keep yelling at you for everything. I am sure that doesn’t feel good.” He nodded in agreement. “It doesn’t feel good for me either but I am healing a deep layer of unexpressed anger from my past and I need to let it out. I need to give myself permission to be angry in order to release and heal all the anger that is stored up inside me. Here is how you can support me. When I ask you to do something I need you to listen and do it right away. Can you also be patient as I complete this process and I promise I will find other ways to express my anger?”
He looks at me wide eyed and asks “What day are you on?”
“Day 10.” I responded
“So that means 11 more days?” he asked with concern.
“Yes 11 more days, but hopefully not 11 more days of anger.”
“I can do that for you.” He replied with relief in his face and love in his eyes.
Curiously the next day my anger subsided and in the car ride from school my son was feeling angry so I encouraged him to start sharing everything he feels angry about. He went on for about 10 minutes as I drove the car sharing random things he was angry about that day then went on to express about things that happened in the past. I held space for him to express any and all anger without any judgment or interruption. When he was done we both felt better. I was then inspired to start waves of gratitude with my son. We would each share a list of things that we are grateful for as we let the feeling of gratitude warm our heart.
Last week when I was in a long line up to cross the Canada/US border I was feeling some anger and frustration bubbling up once again. I made a conscious choice to give all the anger over to Spirit and ask for healing. Immediately I felt waves of energy leaving my body and at the same time I was inspired to start a gratitude stream. I began looking around and saying everything I was grateful for including sitting in my warm car. I forgot about the line up and felt nothing but appreciation.
When I arrived at the customs officer I smiled and handed my passport to him. He immediately smiled and began humming a happy tune. He proceeded to hum in between his questions to me and happily sent me on my merry way. What a beautiful reflection of how I was feeling in my heart.
When we are willing to allow space for all long held emotions to come up and out we are emptying everything out that has been stored from our past trauma. If we resist the expression or try and shove them down once again it will lead to dis-ease. This emptying process can be uncomfortable but it is necessary so we can heal at the deepest possible level. The key is to be curious and allow the emotions to rise up for expression without judgment. Dense energy will often show up as anger, fear, sadness and grief. Many times we don’t even get a sense of what it is about. It is simply old energy in the form of old emotions that need to come up and out. As Shrek says “Better out than in.”
Once you create space and allow the expression of this dense energy, shift your awareness into a conscious stream of gratitude. Then sit back and watch how the Universe reflects the higher vibration of gratitude right back at you in miraculous ways.